Solo Spotlight
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 Hallmark Keepsake Ornament Solo in the Spotlight Barbie 2 in Series 1995 $6.99 Time Remaining: 29d 10h 25m Buy It Now for only: $6.99 |
 HALLMARK BARBIE ORNAMENT NIB SOLO IN THE SPOTLIGHT1995 MATTEL INC $7.95 Time Remaining: 2d 10h 21m Buy It Now for only: $9.95 |
 Hallmark Keepsake Barbie Solo in Spotlight Ornament NO BOX $3.99 Time Remaining: 11h 18m Buy It Now for only: $3.99 |
 Hallmark Miniature Ornament 2001 Solo in Spotlight Barbie and Case QXM5312 $11.95 Time Remaining: 17d 12h 35m Buy It Now for only: $11.95 |
 1995 SOLO IN THE SPOTLIGHT ORNAMENT Barbie Doll Hallmark 2 Mint in Box $6.99 Time Remaining: 21d 7h 24m Buy It Now for only: $6.99 |
 Hallmark 1995 Solo in the Spotlight Barbie Ornament $7.95 Time Remaining: 25d 8h 58m Buy It Now for only: $7.95 |
 HALLMARK BARBIE SERIES ORNAMENTS 123 DEBUTSOLO SPOTLIGHTENCHANTED EVENING $19.99 Time Remaining: 27d 10h 52m Buy It Now for only: $19.99 |
 Hallmark 2001 MINIATURE Barbie Solo in Spotlight Set 2 $15.95 Time Remaining: 10d 13h 29m Buy It Now for only: $15.95 |
 Hallmark Keepsake Ornament Barbie Solo In The Spotlight $9.99 Time Remaining: 17d 20h 58m Buy It Now for only: $9.99 |
 Hallmark Solo In The Spotlight Barbie 1995 NIB $6.50 Time Remaining: 7d 5h 21m Buy It Now for only: $6.50 |
 Hallmark Ornament 1995 Barbie Solo in the Spotlight $7.99 Time Remaining: 12h 15m Buy It Now for only: $7.99 |
 1995 Hallmark Ornament SOLO IN THE SPOTLIGHT BARBIE new in box $2.00 Time Remaining: 2d 16h 32m |
 Hallmark Ornament 1995 Collector Series 2 Barbie Solo in the Spotlight QXl5049 $4.95 Time Remaining: 24d 16h 28m Buy It Now for only: $4.95 |
 1995 Hallmark Barbie Collectors Ornament 2 Solo in the Spotlight $7.00 Time Remaining: 11d 13h 38m Buy It Now for only: $7.00 |
 Hallmark Keepsake Barbie Ornament Solo in Spotlight 2 $16.99 Time Remaining: 20d 7h 40m Buy It Now for only: $16.99 |
 Hallmark Collector Series Ornament Solo In The Spotlight Barbie 1995 NIB $8.00 Time Remaining: 26d 12h 58m Buy It Now for only: $8.00 |
 2001 Hallmark Keepsake Barbie Ornament Solo in the Spotlight Case best gift $11.69 Time Remaining: 13d 9h 35m Buy It Now for only: $11.69 |
 1995 Barbie Solo in the Spotlight 2 in Barbie Series Hallmark Orn $13.56 Time Remaining: 14d 17h 9m Buy It Now for only: $13.56 |
 1998 Hallmark Keepsake Ornament Barbie Collectors Series Solo in the Spotlight $9.99 Time Remaining: 26d 14h 2m Buy It Now for only: $9.99 |
 1995 Hallmark Ornament SOLO IN THE SPOTLIGHT BARBIE Second In Barbie Series $13.97 Time Remaining: 24d 3h 26m Buy It Now for only: $13.97 |
 BARBIE Hallmark PHONE CARD SET Doll Solo in Spotlight GREETING Prepaid New MIP $11.95 Time Remaining: 4d 3h 28m Buy It Now for only: $11.95 |
 Hallmark 05049 Solo in the spotlight Barbie Ornament NRFB Plastic $9.11 Time Remaining: 5d 19h 47m Buy It Now for only: $9.11 |
 1995 BARBIESolo in the Spotlight KEEPSAKE ORNAMENTnib $9.99 Time Remaining: 3d 3h 23m |
 Keepsake Hallmark Barbie Solo In The Spotlight 2nd In Collectors Series NIB $10.99 Time Remaining: 5d 6h 1m Buy It Now for only: $10.99 |
 HALLMARK ORNAMENT SOLO IN THE SPOTLIGHT BARBIE 1995 $3.89 Time Remaining: 21d 17h 53m Buy It Now for only: $3.89 |
 Hallmark Keepsake Ornament Barbie Solo in the Spotlight 1995 $4.95 Time Remaining: 29d 10h 35m Buy It Now for only: $4.95 |
 1995 HALLMARK SERIES BARBIE SOLO IN THE SPOTLIGHT $4.95 Time Remaining: 14d 15h 31m Buy It Now for only: $4.95 |
 Hallmark Keepsake Ornament Barbie Solo In The Spotlight $5.75 Time Remaining: 2d 5h 31m Buy It Now for only: $5.75 |
 HALLMARK 1995 BARBIE SOLO IN SPOTLIGHT ORNAMENT NIB $8.00 Time Remaining: 25d 7h 4m Buy It Now for only: $8.00 |
 BARBIE HALLMARK SOLO IN THE SPOTLIGHT HOLIDAY ORNAMENT $4.99 Time Remaining: 2d 21h 36m Buy It Now for only: $4.99 |
 Hallmark keepsake Christmas Ornament Barbie Solo in the Spotlight 1995 NIB $5.00 Time Remaining: 10d 2h 44m Buy It Now for only: $5.00 |
 1995 Keepsake Solo in the Spotlight Barbie Ornament Handcrafted $9.95 Time Remaining: 11d 13h 53m Buy It Now for only: $9.95 |
 1995 Solo in Spotlight Nostalgic Barbie Hallmark Ornament 2 in Series MIB $10.79 Time Remaining: 13d 9h 38m Buy It Now for only: $10.79 |
 Solo In The Spotlight BARBIE 1995 2 In Series Hallmark Keepsake Ornament $2.99 Time Remaining: 3d 16h 46m |
 Hallmark Keepsake Ornament Barbie Solo in the Spotlight 1995 NIB $5.65 Time Remaining: 16h Buy It Now for only: $5.65 |
 Hallmark Barbie Solo in the Spotlight 1995 NEW in box $10.98 Time Remaining: 19d 13h 52m Buy It Now for only: $10.98 |
 Hallmark Barbie Solo in the Spotlight 1995 NIB $7.99 Time Remaining: 20d 7h 56m Buy It Now for only: $7.99 |
 1995 Hallmark Solo in the Spotlight Barbie Keepsake MIB $13.99 Time Remaining: 10d 13h 35m Buy It Now for only: $13.99 |
 1995 Hallmark Keepsake Series Ornament Barbie Solo in the Spotlight $9.99 Time Remaining: 11d 16h 28m Buy It Now for only: $9.99 |
 1995 Barbie Keepsake Ornament Solo in the Spotlight $7.99 Time Remaining: 2d 10h 10m Buy It Now for only: $7.99 |
 1995 Hallmark Ornament Solo in the Spotlight 2 Serie $13.95 Time Remaining: 15d 9h 45m Buy It Now for only: $13.95 |
 1995 Hallmark Barbie Collectors Ornament 2 Solo in the Spotlight $4.50 Time Remaining: 16d 14h 31m Buy It Now for only: $4.50 |
 Solo In The Spotlight BARBIE 1995 2 In Series Hallmark Keepsake Ornament $5.49 Time Remaining: 1d 14h 56m Buy It Now for only: $5.49 |
 MIB Keepsake Ornament Barbie Solo in the Spotlight 1995 $6.79 Time Remaining: 4d 16h 39m Buy It Now for only: $7.50 |
 NIB Hallmark Keepsake ornament SOLO IN THE SPOTLIGHT BARBIE 1995 $16.95 Time Remaining: 19d 12h 54m Buy It Now for only: $16.95 |
 1995 Hallmark Ornament BARBIE SOLO IN THE SPOTLIGHT $8.88 Time Remaining: 5d 11h 36m Buy It Now for only: $8.88 |
 1995 Hallmark Keepsake Celebration Holiday Barbie Solo In The Spotlight Ornament $10.99 Time Remaining: 3d 9h 41m Buy It Now for only: $10.99 |
 Barbie Solo in the Spotlight Hallmark Ornament 1995 2 $4.95 Time Remaining: 24d 13h 37m Buy It Now for only: $4.95 |
 1995 Hallmark Barbie Solo In Spotlight 2 In Series MIB $8.95 Time Remaining: 17d 17h 33m Buy It Now for only: $8.95 |
 Hallmark Ornament Solo in the Spotlight Barbie LK $4.99 Time Remaining: 10d 14h 2m Buy It Now for only: $4.99 |
 BARBIE 2 ornament SOLO SPOTLIGHT ENCHANTED EVE Hallmark $10.00 Time Remaining: 9d 8h 8m Buy It Now for only: $10.00 |
 Hallmark Keepsake Solo in the Spotlight Barbie 2nd in Barbie Series 1995 NEW $4.88 Time Remaining: 28d 12h 50m Buy It Now for only: $4.88 |
 Hallmark 1995 Ornament BARBIE Solo in the Spotlight Free Shipping $14.40 Time Remaining: 14d 7h 42m Buy It Now for only: $14.40 |
 Hallmark Keepsake Barbie Solo in the Spotlight $8.99 Time Remaining: 12d 10h 27m Buy It Now for only: $8.99 |
 2001 Solo in the Spotlight Barbie Hallmark Ornament $12.95 Time Remaining: 5d 17h 11m |
 1995 SOLO IN THE SPOTLIGHT Barbie Doll Hallmark Keepsake Ornament Exc Cond $7.19 Time Remaining: 9d 10h 26m Buy It Now for only: $7.19 |
 1995 Hallmark Vintage Solo in the Spotlight Barbie Keepsake Ornament NRFB $8.00 Time Remaining: 2d 16h 23m Buy It Now for only: $8.00 |
 1995 Hallmark Barbie Ornament Solo in the Spotlight $7.99 Time Remaining: 25d 8h 18m Buy It Now for only: $7.99 |
 HALLMARK ORNAMENT COLECTIBLE BARBIE SERIES Solo In the Spotlight NEW in WORN BOX $4.25 Time Remaining: 21d 12h 21m Buy It Now for only: $4.25 |
 1995 SOLO IN THE SPOTLIGHT BARBIE ORNAMENT SECOND $7.95 Time Remaining: 8d 8h 35m Buy It Now for only: $7.95 |
 Hallmark 1995 Barbie Solo in the Spotlight Ornament NIB $14.99 Time Remaining: 8d 5h 25m Buy It Now for only: $14.99 |
 1995 Hallmark Ornament Solo In The Spotlight Barbie w Box Tab $3.71 Time Remaining: 10d 11h 20m Buy It Now for only: $3.71 |
 Hallmark Keepsake Solo In Spotlight Barbie Ornament $14.99 Time Remaining: 27d 12h 10m Buy It Now for only: $14.99 |
 BARBIE HALLMARK KEEPSAKE ORNAMENT SOLO IN THE SPOTLIGHT $5.00 Time Remaining: 26d 23h 51m Buy It Now for only: $5.00 |
 Gift Idea NEW N BOX Hallmark Barbie Ornament SOLO IN SPOTLIGHT Discontinued 1995 $8.99 Time Remaining: 3d 11h 28m Buy It Now for only: $8.99 |
 2001 Solo in the Spotlight Case and Barbie Hallmark Ornament $12.95 Time Remaining: 5d 17h 33m |
 1995 Hallmark Solo in the Spotlight Barbie Ornament $10.99 Time Remaining: 8d 20h 15m Buy It Now for only: $10.99 |
 Hallmark Ornament 1995 BARBIE SOLO IN THE SPOTLIGHT $13.50 Time Remaining: 5d 12h 38m Buy It Now for only: $13.50 |
 Barbie Solo Spotlight Hallmark Keepsake Ornament MIB $14.99 Time Remaining: 8d 9h 6m Buy It Now for only: $14.99 |
 1995 Hallmark BARBIE Ornament SOLO IN THE SPOTLIGHT New $9.99 Time Remaining: 25d 6h 2m Buy It Now for only: $9.99 |
 Hallmark Barbie Ornament Solo in the Spotlight 2nd MIB $9.99 Time Remaining: 4d 16h 46m Buy It Now for only: $9.99 |
 Hallmark Barbie Solo in the Spotlight Ornament Boxed $9.99 Time Remaining: 7d 12h 20m Buy It Now for only: $9.99 |
 HALLMARK 1995 BARBIE SOLO IN SPOTLIGHT 2ND IN SERIES ORNAMENT NIB $7.95 Time Remaining: 12d 21h 9m Buy It Now for only: $7.95 |
 1995 HALLMARK BARBIE SOLO IN THE SPOTLIGHT ORNAMENT NIB $9.99 Time Remaining: 2d 8h 21m Buy It Now for only: $9.99 |
 1995 HALLMARK ORNAMENT BARBIE SOLO IN THE SPOTLIGHT $3.99 Time Remaining: 28d 14h 53m Buy It Now for only: $3.99 |
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We Always Teach What We Need to Learn
Let me be frank: I have mixed feelings about getting up in public to speak before large groups. This should come as no surprise since the fear of public speaking tops almost everyone’s list—surpassing death itself! As Jerry Seinfeld puts it, “If you were invited to give a eulogy at a funeral, you’d rather be the guy in the casket than the one at the podium!”
But what may come as a surprise is that for almost 30 years I have made a handsome living from coaching others to speak in public—before large groups and small; before juries deliberating complex issues; in Congress; at shareholders meetings; and with clients giving keynote speeches.
My career has surprised me: I never imagined I’d have landed in the Boardrooms of corporate America, nor the courtrooms where major cases were being hashed out, nor in limousines coaching CEO’s en route to a flight, nor in airplanes, posh hotels, and on expense accounts. The work was demanding and exhilarating. The high fees I’ve commanded, the accolades, the prestige, and the perks made my work fun and gratifying. So why, then, would I rather avoid doing the very thing I coach others in?
I am reminded here of a line from Woody Allen’s classic Annie Hall: “Those who can do, do; those who can’t do, teach; and those who can’t teach, teach gym!”
For years, I preferred to help others hone their message, find their passion, and convey their joy (or at least, their information). But now, it has all come home to roost, for I am on a different path, having completed a book on the subject, called, “More Than Words Can Say: The Making of Inspired Speakers.” It is now my turn to do the lecture circuit, market my book, speak before groups, and sell, sell, sell!
For years, I dreaded the thought. I avoided it and even vowed that I’d never write a book. I kept that pledge for well over 20 years, happy to be running seminars, coaching brilliant clients to open their hearts & minds, proud as a mother hen when her children succeeded, and content to remain behind the scenes.
Don’t get me wrong. It’s not that I never went before an audience. I had my fair share of presentations, keynote speeches of my own, and informal talks. But the thought of appearing before a huge audience, one I did not know, and speaking about my book, made me feel like a used-car salesman in a tacky, plaid suit, hawking his wares.
So, I had to coach myself. And my coaching always starts with awareness—self-awareness (the hardest kind to come by). But there I met resistance. Resistance is the dance partner of awareness. They waltz around, sometimes one leading, sometimes the other. And when resistance had stepped on the toes of awareness once too many times, awareness finally waltzed off alone.
Dancing solo is most liberating. No one else pushing you where you don’t wish to go. No one else’s agenda is besting your own. When my own awareness found its voice, I realized that speaking with others holds no fear for me. One-on-one is my medium. Total strangers are constantly confiding in me. New acquaintances appear to be old friends. Old friends share deep parts of themselves that they share with very few others.
Small groups hold no fright either. I have been running seminars for almost 30 years. I have been in classrooms with 6 – 200. My seminars get consistently rave reviews and in some firms have had waiting lists of two years. So, you might ask, what’s your problem? Why do you resist larger audiences? After all, you know what it takes to charm, seduce, embrace, inform, and inspire? You’ve seen clients transform from boring to sparkling all the time. You’ve been there, yourself! What’s up?
Here’s the deal (and I think this applies to most people):
Speaking to one or to a small group is real. You see them; they see you. You can tell if they’re listening, if they’re alive, awake, with you, against you, daydreaming, etc. You can read their body language. You can meet their eyes. You are real. You’re talking—not performing.
But when the room gets large, when the lights go down, when you are in a spotlight that says “perform,” the real you gets as shy as a nervous kitten. You loose your self-confidence. You imagine all manner of horrors. You are certain they’ll see through you and not be taken in by your façade. And you’d be right!
As long as the real you is hiding behind a façade, you cannot feel at home at the podium. You must strip: not your clothes, but your mask. You may assume that your mask is protecting you, but in reality, it is obscuring your light. And your light is what must shine for others to be engaged when you speak. You must reveal yourself, share your private thoughts, expose your vulnerabilities, be honest with yourself and, thus, with your audience.
The greatest awareness I gained about myself is that I am not a performer: I am, though, a very good communicator. The difference is where I am shining the spotlight of my mind. When it is directed at me, I am ripe for self-consciousness; when it is directed at another, I am open to real communion. I stop asking “how am I doing,” and move to, “Are you with me.” I stop worrying about, “Will they like me,” and start considering, “What can I offer them.”
I now know from testing the waters with individual readers and with small groups, that the book I’ve written is transformational. It is meant to take your fear of public speaking and turn it into your forte. It is aimed at all speakers—in any setting—for whom authenticity and connection are paramount. Readers tell me it has changed forever the way they look at getting up in public. It has changed the way they speak to their spouses … the way they speak to their children. It has, indeed, changed their relationship with themselves.
I could not be more pleased. And I am glad to say that although I may still feel butterflies at the prospect of standing before a large group, I have taught those butterflies to fly in formation. I also figure that if Pavarotti was always nervous before every performance, I can be too.
The difference now is that I do not see it as a performance; I see my role as a sharer. I am in the spotlight to share my passion, my insights, and my pleasure. And when I share, I am engaged in an interchange . . . I am not there all alone. My listeners are up there with me; they just happen to be a few feet away. And I’ve learned to make friends with the spotlight. The spotlight is there to illuminate me until my own light can shine on its own.
About the Author
Having worked both as a Consultant and as a Communications Coach for many years now, I have come to appreciate the subtle distinction between the two. A good consultant will often tell you what you need and help you acquire it; a good coach will elicit from you what you desire and help you achieve it. My clients have referred to me as their coach . . . long before coaching became the vogue. And so, I've adopted the title, The Keynote Coach.